Bipolar Disorder

The Gift of Music

I’m often astonished at the connections people have/had with Sean, knowing how he tended to be pretty shy and often uncomfortable with people. Upon reflection, it became clear that how he really communicated with them was through music. Music is an intangible, really. It’s feeling translated through the artist into sound, a sound that touches the same chord in the listener, if the musician is talented and the listener is an open receiver. That ability to transfer feeling into sound is a gift, a precious one. I would watch Sean and, at times, it seemed that he pulled the feeling out of the ground…. he literally would stretch from his feet toward the ceiling while playing. Other times, he seemed to grimace, like the translation was difficult, almost painful. The resulting message was so forceful that people would often stand in awe, especially if it were the first time hearing him. I am blessed in that many of the people who followed Sean’s music have reached out to me, and almost five years later, continue to communicate with me about him. Some have become friends. It always touches my heart in a way that I am not able to describe. If only I played music. I think, sometimes, that people wish that I could replicate how Sean made them feel, or maybe, they are just still grateful for the experience and I’m the closest to him in form that they can reach out to. There is a group of people who have tirelessly and faithfully volunteered their time and talent on multiple occasions, without asking for anything in return. They are musicians, many of them close friends or colleagues of Sean. From the very beginning, they unselfishly offered their own time and talents in memory of Sean. Each of them has their own special gift, translating their feeling through voice or instrument. I know that Sean treasured every conversation, every chance to play together with the same group of musicians. They spoke the same language, one unique to them, sharing a comradery unlike any other I’ve seen. When I think of Christmas, I think of gratitude. After all, isn’t that what a gift is for? To express love or appreciation. When it comes to thanking each musician who has given life to the Fund named in Sean’s honor, however, I feel humbled by the task. How can you repay what has been given from the heart? There is no more generous group than the musicians who have given of their time and talent to benefit the organization, or maybe, simply to honor their friend. I want to recognize by name each and every one of them, but I am sure that I would inadvertently leave someone out, as there have been countless musicians involved in benefits over the years. I wouldn’t take the chance of offending a single one of them, so I’ll just say thank you. Musicians have a difficult life in many respects. They don’t make a lot of money. As Sean’s manager once told me, making it in music is harder than being a professional athlete. Unfortunately, success in music is not directly proportional to talent, as it is in sports, another frustration of the career. Travel, sleep, family are all impacted by their music, and often, not in positive ways. Nonetheless, they play. They play wherever and whenever they can because they have to. The call to express what they feel through music isn’t a choice; it’s part of their being, as essential as breathing. At a time when wishes for a happy holiday and a prosperous New Year are being spread, I am at a loss to thank the people who are the reason for the organization. I don’t have addresses, or even all of their emails. Hopefully, if you’re reading this, you will pass it on to every musician that you know: Your music is a gift, one that you’ve generously shared with us. Your soul is special because you can touch people through the way your music makes them feel. There is really no adequate compensation for that, at least not with our resources. While I know that Sean was frustrated with the business of music, I also know that his greatest reward was the response of the audience and appreciation expressed by his fans. From Glenn, me, and the Board of The Sean Costello Memorial Fund, thank you for sharing your own unique gifts. May this year bring you health, peace and prosperity, and may your music bring you as much joy as it has to us. Merry Christmas to All![signature color="orange"]Debbie Smith[/signature]